Tales From The Coffinmaster William Shakespeare #2 Romeo Dracula And Juliet Van Helsing: Part Two: Much Ado About A Sparkly Vampire, A Persistent Slayer, And Lovelorn Hosts

di Kristie Lynn Higgins (Autore)

Kristie Lynn Higgins, 2025

*(Hello, my fiends. I am the Narrator. Think of my voice as Vincent Price if he'd spent a weekend lost in The Twilight Zone, a yearrooming with the vampires from What We Do in the Shadows, & ten years mesmerized by the glow of late-night infomercials.)* *(First off, if you haven't devoured the first book, scurry on over whether on two legs, four legs, or eight & grab the first story. And now… a synopsis of sorts of the second book.)* *({clears throat} Tonight… deep within the warped bowels of eternity… lies a studio cursed by time, haunted by style & held together by duct tape, dark rituals & expired sponsorships from RadioShack. Welcome to TARDIS Studio where time's greatest horrors go to syndicate.)* *(Here, in this ghost-ridden garage of glam & gloom, airs the one show brave enough to pierce the veil, crack open the crypt & mock death with a wink & a pun: Tales of the Macabre, your weekly injection of fright, fright &… oh yes, more fright.)* *(Our hosts? First, the Bard of Blood, risen from literary purgatory with a skull in one hand & a SAG card in the other, Coffinmaster William Shakespeare, delivering bone-chilling sonnets with a touch of sass. And by his side, the scream queen turned steampunk mortician, half-goddess, half-ghoul, all glitter & once host of Creature Feature, Dr. Paula Bearer, whose PhD in fright & her eyeliner could raise the dead.)* *(But tonight, the chills have become too real. The studio walls are sweating, the fog machine is melting, the floorboards scream in tones uncannily similar to Cher's Believe & somewhere offscreen, something ancient & angry is torching continuity like it's the final season of Game of Thrones.)* *(Trapped in a spiraling inferno of smoldering stage props, burning script pages & unspeakably cursed Starbucks cups, our hosts must confront their greatest nemesis yet with rising heat & rising ratings. It's survival of the sassiest, as they battle time distortions, existential dread & what might be the ghost of a flaming Simon Cowell.)* *(Will Shakespeare monologue his way to salvation? Will Dr. Bearer hot-wire a kitten fan using leftover glitter glue and birthday candles? Or will TARDIS Studio become just another charred footnote in the Netflix of the damned?)* *(One studio. Two doomed hosts. Infinite snark. This isn't just horror… it's theatrical, thermonuclear, tongue-in-cheek terror. It's Tales of the Macabre: Too Hot to Haunt.)* *(Coming soon. BYO fire extinguisher.)* When the Coffinmaster rewrites Shakespeare, blood runs thicker than ink. In 'Tales From The Coffinmaster William Shakespeare #2: Romeo Dracula and Juliet Van Helsing: Part Two: Much Ado About A Sparkly Vampire, A Persistent Slayer, And Lovelorn Hosts' classic literature gets a monstrous makeover. As a supernatural apocalypse looms, star-crossed lovers Romeo Dracula and Juliet Van Helsing must unite, despite being heirs to warring vampire and hunter bloodlines. This horror comedy mashup fuses gothic romance, paranormal satire, and monster mayhem in a tale where Shakespeare meets Dracula *(Not really, but sounded good for the description)* & Van Helsing hunts more than just monsters she hunts fate itself Perfect for fans of YA horror, vampire romance satire, supernatural mashups, and those who love monsters, ghouls, and classic tales told with a fanged grin. Part Two continues the undead love story with more monsters, more madness, and a comet full of blood. Enter the Crypt if you dare. *(Oh, & more of me!)*

• Autore: Kristie Lynn Higgins
• Anno edizione: 2025
• Editore: Kristie Lynn Higgins
• Formato: EPUB3 con DRMFREE
• Lingua: Inglese
• Compatibilità: Tutti i dispositivi (eccetto Kindle)
• Layout: Reflowable
• EAN: 9798232810689